Thursday, 26 February 2009

Your Problems vs. My Problems

Recent scenario - guy owes me £190. Guy calls me to confirm amount he owes and the phonecall goes like this:

guy: So I owe you £190.
me: Yep.
guy: Hmm, I guess I'll need to go to the cash machine.
me: Yes, I think that would be in order.
guy: Hmm, and the cash machine will only dispense money in quantities of 20.
me: Yes, thats usually how it works.
guy: Well, hmm, I don't suppose you would have change?
me: No, sorry, I'm broke at the moment.
guy: Ah, well, hmm....uhhh....just...uhhh...well, I'll figure it out.

Does anyone else see a totally unnecessary conversation here? That could have saved us both about 5 minutes. In my life, I could do a lot of things in 5 minutes, but listening to you work out your problems over the telephone isn't on the list of hopeful future experiences.

There seems to be a problem (no pun intended) with people today not being able to distinguish their problems from other's problems. In that case, his problem would have been that he owes me money. My problem is that he owes me money. We actually SHARE a problem. His secondary problem is that he owes me an amount that cannot be automatically dispensed by a cash machine. I do not have anymore problems. My problem stops at "you owe me money". I will, however, have a new problem if I am not paid. And so will he. But working out your problem of not having the right amount while wasting my time is only creating a new problem for me: I don't have time to listen to it, nor do I want to.

The thing is, I don't give a flying fuck if you can't get £190 from a cash machine. I don't care if you go to the corner store and get change for £200, if you magically turn a £20 note into a tenner, or if you give up and give me the £200 because you obviously have trouble with this sort of thing. I don't care. Just pay me. Fuck YOU, pay ME.

Your problems vs. My problems.